Concerning Tootsie Pops
by Fair Sword Maiden
Summary: Mist goes on a quest to find the answer to the age-old question, "How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Which mercenary will give her the correct answer?


**Disclaimer: I do not own Fire Emblem or Tootsie Roll Pops. (You'll find out soon enough!)**

**A/N: This is a completely random idea that popped into my head as I was trying to fall asleep the other night. This takes place before Path of Radiance, when all of the characters we know are young. Enjoy!**

It all began one sunny afternoon. Mist, who was around the age of eight, was doing her daily chores. It was the same routine everyday; dusting, sweeping, washing clothes, weeding the garden, making beds and so forth. But today in particular, she was performing some very special chores.

You see, Mist was the daughter of Greil, the general of the Greil Mercenaries. As a general, her father was extremely busy and never had time for himself. So today, Mist decided to clean his study. She dusted the shelves, cleaned the windows, swept the floor, and tackled the mess on his desk. Mist painstakingly organized all the papers and maps. In the end, everything was chronologically stacked into piles which would make it easier for Greil to access his information.

Mist stood back and smiled. She was pleased with her work. As she left his study, she saw him walking in the distance.

"Hi, Father," Mist said as she walked past him.

"Hello, Mist. What are you doing around here? You never usually visit this part of the house," Greil said.

"I was just doing some cleaning," Mist with a smile.

"Mist, you were doing something sneaky around here weren't you? You have that grin on your face," Greil said.

"Oh you'll find out soon enough," Mist said as she walked off.

Greil opened the door to his study and was greeted with a surprise. The entire room was sparkling clean from the floor to ceiling. He couldn't remember the last time he saw his study this clean. He inspected his desk and saw how organized the papers and maps were. There was only one person who would take the time to do this; Mist.

Greil ran out of the study and down the hall.

"Mist!" he yelled once he caught up to her.

Mist turned around. "Yes, Father?"

"You cleaned my study, didn't you?" he asked.

"Yes, I did," she said.

"Why did you do that? You have plenty of chores. You don't have to waste your time cleaning up after my mess," Greil said.

"Father, you're always doing so much for me, Ike, and the rest of the mercenaries that you never have time for yourself. Cleaning up your study was the least that I could do," Mist said.

"Aww, Mist. You're so innocent and kind, just like your mother," Greil said.

"Really?" Mist asked.

"Yes, I see so much of her in you," Greil said. He then reached into his pocket.

"You're lucky that I went into town today. I have a special treat for you as a reward for cleaning my study," Greil said. He handed her three tootsie pops; one was chocolate, the other blueberry, and the third one was strawberry.

"Tootsie pops! For me?" Mist squealed.

"All of them are for you. Just don't tell Ike I gave you candy," Greil said with a laugh.

"Thank you, father!" Mist said as she ran outside.

Once Mist was out in the fields, she decided to eat her first tootsie pop. She unwrapped the strawberry pop and began licking it. She wanted to get to the tootsie roll center as fast as she could. In that very moment, Mist was struck with the age old question:

"How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Mist asked herself. She had to know. Just then, her friend, Rolf, came walking to her.

"Hey Mist! Do you want to play tag?" Rolf asked.

"Not now, Rolf. I'm busy," Mist said.

"Busy doing what?" Rolf asked.

"I'm busy eating my tootsie pop," Mist asked.

"You have a tootsie pop? Where did you get that?" Rolf asked.

"Father gave it to me as a reward for cleaning his study," Mist said.

"Wow, you're lucky. I've only had a tootsie pop once," Rolf said.

"Hey Rolf, can I ask you something?" Mist asked.

"Yeah, what is it?" Rolf asked.

"How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Mist asked.

"Gee, I don't know. I bet that it takes a lot of licks. You should go ask one of my brothers, they're a lot smarter than me," Rolf suggested.

So, Mist set out on her quest to find the answer to her question. The next person she came across was Boyd, Rolf's older brother.

"Boyd, do you have a minute to answer a quick question," Mist asked.

"No," Boyd said with sarcasm.

"Please, Boyd! There is something that I really want to know!" Mist said.

"Well, you can tell me what's on your mind. Just promise me that you'll shut up as soon as you're done," Boyd said.

"Alright fine. How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Mist asked.

"Hmm. . .Do you have a tootsie pop that I can see?" Boyd asked.

"Yes, it's right here," mist said as she handed him the chocolate pop.

"Thanks," Boyd said. He quickly unwrapped the pop and ate it in one bite.

"The answer. . .is one," Boyd said in between chewing.

"Boyd! That was mine! You weren't supposed to eat it!" Mist yelled as she ran away from him.

She then bumped into Rhys, the healer of the Greil Mercenaries.

"Rhys!" Mist yelled. The priest practically jumped out of his skin.

"Y-yes? What do you want, Mist?" Rhys stammered.

"How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Mist asked.

"I don't know. But when I was your age, I loved eating tootsie pops-"

Mist walked away before he continued to ramble on about his past. She then met up with Gatrie, who probably wasn't the most appropriate person to ask.

"Hey, Mist! What can I do for you today? Do you need me to be your bodyguard at the playground?" he asked.

"Um . .no. I just wanted to ask you a quick question," she said.

"Let me guess. You want to know how hot I think you are on a scale of one to ten," Gatrie said.

"No! How many-"

"Since you're still really young, I'm just going to say seven," he said.

"You are extremely rude! I just wanted to know how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Mist asked.

"Tootsie pops, eh? Well, I have no idea. However, since you're a really sweet girl, I might start referring to you as my personal tootsie pop," he said.

"Ugh! Forget it!" Mist said as she ran away. Unfortunately, the next victim was Shinon. He was his normal cocky self, practicing his archery.

"Another bull's eye! When I'm on the battlefield, I'll always be the MVP!" Shinon boasted in an arrogant manner.

"Shinon! I need to ask you something!" Mist yelled, breaking his concentration.

"What is it? Make it quick," Shinon said impatiently, stringing another arrow.

"How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Mist asked.

Shinon shot another bull's eye. "That's such a stupid question. I'm not going to waste my time answering it. Tootsie pops are for babies," Shinon said.

"Oh! You're so rude!" Mist pouted as she stormed off. She decided to actually ask someone who knew about food; Oscar. He was the older brother of Boyd and Rolf, and he was also the cook for the Greil Mercenaries.

So, mist made her way into the kitchen, where Oscar was preparing a chicken.

"Hello, Mist. Do you need something to eat?" Oscar asked.

"I actually came here to ask you a question about food," Mist said. Oscar handed her a knife.

"You know the rules. If you're in the kitchen, you have to help. You can cut up these carrots," Oscar said.

"Oscar, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Mist asking while cutting carrots.

"Hmm. . .that's a good question. It depends if you actually lick the tootsie pop or just chew it to get to the center," Oscar said.

"Boyd said it only took one because he chewed it. That wasn't fair because he tricked me into giving him one of my tootsie pops!" Mist said.

Oscar tried to hold in laughs, but failed. When he burst out laughing at the incident, Mist left the kitchen. Once she was outside, she saw Titania hanging up clothes to dry.

"Hello, Mist. Do you want to help me hang up the laundry?" Titania asked.

"Sure," Mist said as she grabbed a pile of wet clothes and started hanging them on the clothesline.

"Titania, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Mist asked.

"Well. . .I'm not sure. I can't remember the last time I had a tootsie pop. Don't you think that this is a question that concerns children only?" Titania asked.

"Yeah, I guess you're right," Mist asked. Just then, she remembered someone who could help.

"I should ask Soren. He's always reading and studying. Surely he would know the answer," Mist said to herself. She then walked back to the fortress and went to the library room. This was the only place where she could find Soren. Soren was her adopted older brother who was around the same age as Ike. He was a weird kid; he had red eyes, he always dressed in black, and he was far too serious. Soren was also very rude at times, because he had little patience.

Mist was right; there Soren sat at a table reading a book about great war leaders in ancient history.

"Soren!" Mist said. A pair of red eyes looked up from the book.

"Yes, what is it?" Soren asked.

"I need to know the answer to a question, and I felt like I needed to ask a really smart person like you," Mist asked.

Soren lowered his book. "And what might this earth-shattering question be?" he asked.

"How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Mist asked.

Soren sighed. "I don't know the answer off the top of my head. However, I may be able to direct you to the person who knows the answer," Soren said.

"Really? Can you please tell me?" Mist asked.

"Just sit still for a short while. I'll tell you in a minute," Soren said as he stood up and scanned the library shelves. Eventually, he pulled out a thick book on magical creatures.

"What does that book have to do with tootsie pops?" Mist asked.

"Stop asking questions and just listen!" Soren snapped. He began flipping through the pages, muttering to himself. Eventually, he stopped.

"Here it is. The only person who knows the answer to your question is an owl named Mr. Owl," Soren said as he showed Mist the picture. It looked like a cartoon drawing of an fat owl wearing a funny looking hat and large glasses.

"Where can I find him?" Mist asked.

"He lurks around in the woods. He only pops up when he senses that someone wants to know the answer to the question you just asked," Soren explained.

"I guess I'll take a short walk through the woods," Mist said.

"It wouldn't be wise to go by yourself. It could be dangerous. You must bring someone with you," Soren said.

Mist grabbed his wrist. "You can come with me!" she exclaimed.

"Absolutely not! I have far more important things to do than to look for an owl, whose only purpose is to tell people how many licks it takes to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop!" Soren said.

"PLEASE?" Mist begged.

"No! I won't go with you! That quest is for babies!" Soren said.

"You are so mean, Soren!" Mist shouted as she ran out of the library. She accidentally bumped into her brother, Ike, who was practicing his swordsmanship.

"Watch where you're going! Oh, it's just you, Mist. What's wrong? You look upset," Ike said.

"Soren didn't want to accompany me on my quest," Mist said.

"What quest?" Ike asked.

"To find Mr. Owl," Mist said.

Ike rolled his eyes. Mist had wanted to go on ridiculous quests before, but now she seemed to have lost her mind.

"Mist, there is no Mr. Owl -"

"Yes there is! Soren even looked him up! He's the only person who knows the answer to my question! Please, will you go with me?" Mist begged.

Although Ike wanted to practice his swordsmanship, he didn't like seeing Mist upset. So, he decided to play her game just to make her happy.

"Alright, Mist. I'll help you find Mr. Owl," Ike said.

"Yay! Come on, let's go in the woods," Mist said as she grabbed his wrist.

So, Ike and Mist traveled through the woods for about two minutes when they heard a strange noise.

"Well hello there!" a voice said.

"What the heck was that?" Ike asked as he held his sword in the air.

"It was me," the voice said again.

"Ike, it's coming from up there," Mist said as she pointed to a tree.

A round owl wearing glasses and a funny hat swooped down to a lower branch.

"Are you the legendary Mr. Owl?" Mist asked.

"Yes I am," Mr. Owl said.

"Mr. Owl, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Mist asked.

"Let's see," Mr. Owl said as he pulled out a tootsie pop, "One. . .two. . .three."

"That's it?" Mist asked.

"That's all there is to it," Mr. Owl said.

"Cool! Let me try!" Mist said as she pulled out her blueberry flavored tootsie pop.

"One. . .two. . .three," she said in between licks. Much to her dismay, she didn't get to the tootsie roll center of the tootsie pop.

"Hey! This was all a scam, wasn't it! It doesn't just take three licks to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop! You lied, Mr. Owl!" Mist shouted.

But it was too late. Mr. Owl had already flown off.

"So. . .you dragged me all the way out here just for this?" Ike asked.

"Yeah, it was kind of stupid. I just really wanted to know how many licks it takes to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop," Mist said.

"That's simple, Mist. Why don't you just count how many licks it takes. That way, you'll know," Ike said.

Mist's eyes widened. "Why didn't I think of that in the first place? I could've saved so much time! Man, I think that I wasted my entire day," Mist said.

"Well, I think that you learned an important lesson, Mist. Some things just aren't worth your time," Ike said.

"You're right. Let's go home," Mist said.

As they walked back to the fortress, something hit Ike.

"Hey Mist, where did you get those tootsie pops anyways?" Ike asked.

"Oh, Father gave them to me as a reward for cleaning his study," Mist said.

"You got rewarded with tootsie pops for doing chores? Man, I should try that," Ike said to himself.

As soon as they got to the fortress, Greil was waiting for them.

"Ah, there you two are. I was wondering where you went. Anyways, it's time for dinner, and Oscar says that the table needs to be set, Mist-"

"I'll do it!" Ike shouted. He then ran off to the kitchen.

"That's odd. I've never seen Ike volunteer for anything so willingly before," Greil said.

"That's because there might be tootsie pops involved," Mist said.

Greil and Mist then laughed as they made their way to the kitchen.

**A/N: Ta-dah! So there you have it. Mist finally learned the truth behind how many licks it took to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop. I hope you guys liked it, because I did. I just graduated from high school, and I wrote this because I was in a happy mood. Well, you know must do. . .please review! **


End file.
